Thursday, July 21, 2011

Detox week

So, first week of eating healthy.  It really sucks a huge fat dick.  I have really been staying strong.  I have been exercising twice a day (except today, I only worked out one time).  Tomorrow is my day off.  I'm excited.  Really excited.  The eating healthy has been much much harder.  I had a headache from Sunday to Tuesday.  Tuesday night it was so bad that for an hour in the evening before my ibuprofen started working I thought I would vomit.  Since then I have been having cravings.  Weird cravings that I n.e.v.e.r. have.  The last time I had a donut might have been a year ago.  I am craving donuts.  And sugar of all kinds.  Pie. Cinnamon rolls.  Chocolate.  Who fucking cares, I'll eat it.  My hunger is tripled by the fact that a. I'm exercising alot, b. I'm on my period, c. my caloric intake has been reduced significantly just based on the amount of fast food I'm not eating, that I'm desperate to eat anything. I know I am eating plenty of food,  but at any time I could go eat a meal at Whataburger. Food is for energy. Not for soothing myself.  I have to stay strong.  If I don't fold by then, which I don't think I will, I am going to eat a junior meal on Sunday. I can't wait.  I'm living for Sunday right now.  I'm on the day of detox when I'm starting to think fuck it, life isn't worth it.  That is not true.  Healthy food is perfectly fine.  It tastes good.  Why can't that be good enough. I can do this. I am stronger than my cravings.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

I like your humour, and sarcasm, and the way the you write. Simple, direct, ironic. I'm gonna follow you. Best regards from Portugal.