Fun on a Friday night

I'm at the laundromat. It's like a ghost town in this place. I love it. I miss that about having a job where I worked until midnight. Everything you do, you do alone. Even when you do things before work, because nothing is busy at 10 in the morning on a weekday. (Except maybe the grocery store in a neighborhood where a bunch of old people live.

I feel the need for bullets. The non-violent kind. The literary kind.

• My area manager is a lez. I thought the interview went overly well, it made me wonder. Usually, me and women don't just jive automatically. I was feeling a little pinging on my radar yesterday when I kept looking at her nails, then down at mine and they looked like they were kept the same exact way.
• My mom has a knack for dating X-treme assholes. She should join the x-games, or should I say ex-games. Ha! Anyways, She was telling me that they were breaking up and having a fight and he threatened to come to my house. I don't know why. He probably thought that my mom keeps secrets from me or something and he was going to tell me. Not the case, but I guess he thought he has something over her. So she tells him, "Would you like me to give you her address?" Clearly he wasn't prepared for her calling his bluff. So I tell her, "I don't know what he is going to do, but come on motherfucker." She says, "I know, you can handle yourself." Then she says, and this is a direct quote, "I wanted to tell him 'She wouldn't shit in your mouth if your guts were on fire.'" I fell out laughing. Truer words were never spoken.
• My favorite thing about my job is when people play instruments in the store.
• My second favorite thing about my job is that, surprisingly, no one is ever angry. They sure don't take it out on me if they are, because they know good and well I have what they need.
• The worst thing about my job is that I am on my feet 8 hours a day. My feet hurt so bad at the end of the night it isn't even funny. It feels like my heels are bruised.
• The best thing about my roommate is that I never see him.
• The worst thing about my roommate is that the only way I know he has stopped by the house is by his beard hairs in the sink. I have one pet peeve. Well, two, the other has to do with ice trays.
• I am thinking about doing volunteer work tutoring in a correctional facility. The thought really excites me, but I wonder how I would get anything done, like sleeping and eating.
• There are not enough hours in the day.