Things I Think About

1. I wonder what people think of my life when they see my home.  In one very small section of my apartment I have a pin with the word "Diarrhea" on it, a dry erase board with some very nonsensical stuff and at the bottom (next to where the Diarrhea pin is propped up) it says "I have an insatiable hunger for food and masturbation. L.King", and a mobile dangling from the ceiling with pictures of naked women.  I think that  combination screams, "Normal people beware. Vanilla need not apply."

2.  Though it is clear to me that tall guy isn't into me (as it should have been the first time he didn't call me back) I did get a little something out of it.  I was reminded of Bukowski and some good music.  I laid in bed reading poems and listening to music at 4 in the morning. It made me feel a little of what I used to feel a lot.  Maybe it is inspiration.  Maybe it is a kinship to troubled people.  Maybe it is awe of talent.  Maybe it is the realization that I am a little different.

If you want a little taste:

Listen to this:




Read this:

Oh Yes

there are worse things than
being alone
but it often takes decades
to realize this
and most often
when you do
it's too late
and there's nothing worse
than
too late. 

Charles Bukowski