My ovaries are black holes that suck all hope and joy out of every situation.

I want sensory deprivation for the next two weeks. I'm going to have PMS on vacation. Joy.

Sometimes life makes me feel like I am trying to jump into double dutch- a small sense of anxiety, head nodding and missed opportunity. When I do finally jump I feel like I just get tangled in the ropes.

By sometimes I mean two weeks out of every month. And for those two weeks my whole outlook on life is changed. Like I'm a completely different person, only worse because I can see how I'm acting and I can't do anything about it. Trapped like a rat.

Maybe I have PMDD. In the symptom column check "yes" to all. Especially decreased interest, it says in "usual" activities, but make a mental note "all" activities. Even New Zealand really isn't enough to get me excited. What a sad, sad day when vacation to someplace I have been wanting to go for years now doesn't even put a blip on my excitement radar.

I should really start documenting my moods. I don't feel like it.