Horrorscopes

What a crock of shit. Read my horoscope for the year. I especially like this little gem. "Your focus is excellent, and you know what you want."  My focus is excellent for a senile 80 year old.  What the fuck.  I swear to you I cannot figure out what day it is.  And it is all downhill from there.  But yes I do know what I want.  I want to finish reading the Dark Tower series.  Aside from that I don't even know what I want to eat for fucking dinner.  I know what I want?  Yeah.  Also this year both my dogs will start flying and they will get a job and start paying for themselves.  Kyle will have ambition and unicorns and elves will come and sing me to sleep every night.  I can't wait.  How did they know me so well?  They must have sent spies.  Blind ones.