Oh, dear, sweet weekend! How I love thee!

Friday through Monday are pretty smooth sailing. By Tuesday I'm tired again.

The adviser from the English department sent me an email this week about the Honors program. Seeing as I'm brilliant and my "outstanding academic" something or another I'm eligible for the honors program. I didn't believe it at first. I literally thought, "Oh, that was probably a mistake." Then I got a second email from a sorority asking me to join. It was an honors sorority.

My life just took a turn for the nerdy. Apparently , I'm on list somewhere that says I'm smart. How do you like that?

Not like I'm going to apply for the Honors program. I don't really see the benefits. I definitely see the drawbacks. More work. I don't need a star by my name when I graduate to feel validated.

On the movie watching agenda this weekend: Farewell, My Concubine and Jacob's Ladder.
On the listening agenda: Ray LaMontagne "Empty" on the album "Til the Sun Turns Black"
(I especially like the lines, "well I looked my demons in the eyes, laid bare my chest, said do your best, destroy me. You see, I've been to hell and back so many times, I must admit you kind of bore me.")

You can see a small clip of "Jolene" sung "Live at Abbey Road".

I kinda feel like if he were to shave he would look somewhat like Stephen Colbert. Do you get that feeling?

Or you can watch this clip of part of "Empty"


I never said it was a happy song.

Tell me what you saw, and I'll tell you what you missed

I have thoughts. Crazy, rambling, beasts of thoughts. I sit quietly as if on a park bench and watch them go by like strangers. Once past I scarcely think of them, these thoughts. But sometimes they frighten me.

-Bukowski, is he a good read? I wonder what is the definitive Bukowski?
-I wonder what I would be like as a mother? Would I freak out about things that I normally wouldn't have out of frustration or some other motherly sort of feeling that I can't help?
-I wonder if Laura will be ok. What is happening to her? What about Iris?
-Wait. Those aren't real people, Lauren.
-I think I'm snapping. Me and the beans.
-If I just started reading again I would find out what is happening to Iris and Laura.
-No, I know where it is going and I don't think I quite like it. I'd rather sit here and make things up.
-Iris isn't going to tell Laura that she has been having an affair and everything will be fine.
-I like Modest Mouse.
-Paul Simon is pretty good too.
-I like musicians who write songs about literature. I don't know that Paul Simon has done this. -I was thinking about Modest Mouse, Led Zeppelin, the like.
-It seems like this is seeping out. Am I talking?
-No.

Riot anyone?

I can not tell you how glad I am that the week is done. Five days straight is just to many. What do you say to a friendly riot? You know in protest? To get the work week to four days and not five? Any takers?

Saturday, Kyle and I will be going to San Antonio. There simply is no rest for the weary. We are escorting his 18 year old cousin. He has Asperger syndrome. So in other words he is autistic. He also loves heavy metal. So we are taking him to a heavy metal concert. He also knows every animal genus and species on the face of the earth, plus dinosaurs. He has a photographic memory and puts it to use working in the library.

But first I am going to have to wake up and do some homework. A lot of homework.

I've been very sick

I have been really sick since Sunday morning. I thought I was just hung over from drinking THREE drinks at Corley's graduation party. I'm pretty sure I was sick. Today is the first day I've been able to sit at the computer. I have watched so much tv it is unbelievable. I lost about five pounds this week. Three more pounds and I will weigh as much as I did in high school. So pretty much I'm wasting away. Nothing like violent illness to get you ready for bikini season, right?

In the middle of being deathly ill I had to go to the Tool concert. I couldn't miss it. We drive over an hour to San Antonio. We have to walk a long way from the car to our seats with no breaks. So when we get to our seats I'm tired. There was some shit band before Tool we had to suffer through. Then Tool comes on and everybody stands up. Well, fuck if I can stand up for two hours. I could stand up a little if I wanted to see something or peek through people but mostly I saw the backs of the people in front of me.

Oh, by the way those people where on their cell phones almost the entire time. If they weren't on their cell phones they were chit chatting to one another. This is becoming an epidemic every time we go to a concert there is someone yelling in our ear. I did not spend 50 fucking dollars to hear those people chat. I'm done ranting. Let me tell you how weird Maynord is.

He comes out in some tight jeans and a tight white undershirt, boots and an old bent up cowboy hat. That is weird, but during the first song he takes the hat off and does some sort of a back bend kind a thing and it waving the hat around over his head like his is riding a bull. At one point he goes behind the giant equipment wall (we can see him back there because we are about 150 ft up and really close the side of the stage) he sits down and takes off his boots. The whole stage was a projector. Which was really, really neat-o. But unfortunately the vocals weren't turned up enough so we couldn't hear him singing. The drums were way to high. Before they come on Kyle says to me that he thinks this bass might shake a shit out of him. The first boom of bass and I was like oh my god that might actually happen to me. For the entire first song my stomach gurgled to the bass. When the bass shook my stomach my stomach churned. Thankfully I got used to it, but after two hours I was incredibly tired.

On a some what adjacent note

I recieved my Mp3 player that I bought online at the cheapest price I found. I ended up going with a Creative due to the downloadable library books. (That's why this is adjacent.) And I ended up getting a 30gb. What can I say it screamed value. I could have bought a couple of gigs for 100 or got 15 times the storage for only double the price. Bargain! Plus between me and Kyle we have a lot of music. I didn't realize until I started putting it on there. I never thought that seeing a list of alphabetized musicians could bring me such pleasure.

P.S. I think I'm in love with Amy Winehouse. You Know I'm No Good favorite song this week.

"I cheated myself like I knew I would
I told you I was trouble
You know that I'm no good"

The intimacies of live music

The Damien Rice concert was incredible. The best concert I believe I have ever been to.

He started out so soft, and sultry and right when you needed it he came on strong and hard and raw. But before he could overwhelm you with all the screaming he slowed it down again. Right when you thought you were going to have to beg for more, he gave you just what you needed. Your fingers slip from the handle you had on reality. When he slows it down again you have to catch your breath and open your eyes to get your bearings and figure out where you are.

Wait... What are we talking about? Oh, yeah. The concert.

And just when you think you can't scream anymore, he came. Again... For an encore.

Damien Rice

Tomorrow, Corley and I are going to see Damien Rice. I am very excited. I've been listening to Grey Room like it is going out of style.

Still my roof has got no ceiling

One minute your doing perfectly harmless paper crafts and you think what a good idea it would be to listen to music. The next thing you know you are listening to that music and thinking about the boy that turned you on... to it. Then you are thinking about that boy, that summer. There is always a smile. But you just have to wonder.... is he okay? Is he in love? Does he have a wife or kids? A steady job? Will I ever find out? I hope he is good, because he did a great thing for me. He made me feel incredible about myself at a time when your young and unsure of yourself. Sometimes the wonder of life really touches me. Just the way people and relationships mold your life. Well, wherever you are, thank you. I sincerely hope you find something really great out there.

Early morning edit: Henry DeTamble reminds me of him. This is probably the reason I love The Time Traveler's Wife the way I do. I think it is the dark hair, light eyes phenomenon.

That summer always leads to thinking about Corley. It was a great summer. The very best summer of my life, in a way that was so carefree. I had so much fun.

and some days it feels like nothing
it always used to feel like plenty.

Break-ins

Our neighbor two houses down scared someone off trying to break into their home. This is really weird to me. For one thing I leave our back door open (not unlocked, but literally open) pretty much around the clock whether we are home or not. My car is almost never locked and most of the time our front door isn't locked either. They wouldn't even have to break in to our house they could just stroll in. Second of all they said they were two teenage kids running away. They tried to break in at midnight when the people were home. They live on the corner so they don't have a privacy fence, and they kids were trying to get in the back door. Let me say this again cause I just don't believe it, the occupants of the house were there. This is the safest neighborhood I have ever lived in. Not that I haven't lived in some safe neighborhoods, but this one is by far the safest. Nobody lives here but middle aged white people. They might break into your retirement fund, but they won't break into your house. In fact our neighborhood is so white bred that a couple months back me and Kyle were leaving the house and there was a black man walking his dog and it really took me by surprise. I was telling Kyle, "Look! Look! There is a black man! " We lived here for over a year and had never seen one black person. I haven't seen him again. The other people probably ran him out of town.

I'm done ripping myself off

Can we talk about The Raconteurs?

The cd is so good. I am pretty much in love with Jack White. I mean I don't think I would sleep with him or anything like that. It is more of, "I love your musical genius please shine more of it down on me, and faster. " Okay, I may sleep with him in some alternate universe only if he didn't have that horrible mustache, Loretta Lynn was involved, and a jar of Mayonnaise.

Last Year's Concert Line Up

Chuck Berry
Death Cab for Cutie
Beck
Damien Rice/ Fionna Apple

I don't think there was anything else.

So far on the roster for this year:

Clutch on March 10th
The Toadies on March 12th
Tool March on 26th

I come from the water

I am really excited. I just bought tickets to The Toadies. That means Tool and The Toadies in March! Wow! And tickets were so cheep! They were like $23. Made my week!

sighs

I love Damien Rice. One of those cd's Corley made me was 9. When I listen to a cd I haven't heard it generally goes that I will find one song and listen to it over and over and over until I can't listen anymore and then I will listen to the rest of the cd. That song is Coconut Skins.



I put this one here so you could listen, but he is really nice to look at too!